For women, community is more than a buzzword.
The word “community” is often used as a category or label to describe a gathering of people who share characteristics.
However, this definition misses the mark when we talk about building company culture or developing a strong community at work.
Especially for underrepresented employees, just gathering in a group of people similar to us is not necessarily what we imagine in our ideal community.
This is because “community” is not just the gathering itself.
If this were the case, then every employee resource group (ERG) would be successful. Every meeting in a room full of women would be empowering. Furthermore, every company leader could toss together a half-hearted happy hour or bonding event, and say that this event has successfully built “community.”
Unfortunately, this is simply not the case. Physically gathering is the first step to fostering community, but it is not enough.
Why?
Because “community” is more than a physical effort, or a physical space, or shared similarities between a group of people. “Community” is a feeling generated by authentic fellowship, shared resources, and shared ideas.
To put it in other words, community is not what a certain group of people share. More importantly, community is how they share.
To better highlight this definition, we can think about the scientific definition for “community,” which is “a group of interdependent organisms of different species growing or living together in a specific habitat.”
Although this definition relates to instinct and survival, it sheds light on how important “community” is in the workplace, especially for women and underrepresented employees, for whom community is survival.
Interdependence requires trust, authenticity, and an understanding of where you could use a hand or give a hand. Growing together requires sharing goals and resources toward the benefit of the community.
Community, when run by the how rather than the what, can be the key to reaching your goals and making genuine connections.
So how exactly do we create authentic communities? How do we go beyond just gathering?
Luckily, there are some incredible women thought leaders who are asking these questions, redefining what community means, and showing us how we can foster it.
3 Steps Toward Building Community, 3 Books Written by Women
1. The Art of Gathering: Why We Meet and How it Matters by Priya Parker
Step 1: Understand how, and why, people gather.
Priya Parker’s childhood was spent toggling between radically different homes. Her mother is a liberal, vegetarian, New-Age Buddhist from India. Her father, a conservative, barbecue-loving evangelical Christian from the United States.
Naturally, Parker went on to study conflict resolution.
The Art of Gathering is not just a guidebook for cultivating meaningful community. It is an intimate look at the human psyche. While over time cultures have developed ritualized gatherings, Parker encourages us to get to the root of how it all started. She encouraged us to ask why. What is the purpose of this meeting, this ERG, this pizza party? What is the purpose for this birthday party, this outing with coworkers? Why am I throwing a dinner party? Why am I instituting a monthly happy hour at my job?
“When we skip this [why] step,” Parker writes, “we often let old or faulty assumptions about why we gather dictate the form of our gatherings. We end up gathering in ways that don’t serve us, or not connecting when we ought to” (1-2).
The Art of Gathering will help any hopeful community member understand how to build genuine purpose and connection into every gathering. If you love to gather, but are sick of meaningless meetings and stale networking events getting in the way of community, then this book is for you.
2. Inclusion on Purpose: An Intersectional Approach to Creating a Culture of Belonging at Work by Ruchika Tulshyan
Step 2: Embrace difference. Really.
Ruchika Tulshyan is a DEI expert, diversity and leadership writer at Forbes, and celebrated speaker and journalist. In Inclusion on Purpose, she brings up one of the biggest taboos in the DEI conversation right off the bat.
No, she writes, “inclusion is not an inborn trait” (3).
Even if we know equity is important, we, as a society, still have not made equitable choices. This is because inclusion is a learned practice, not something we are born or even socialized to do or understand.
Inclusion on Purpose is spectacular because it focuses on DEI from an intersectional lens. It encourages us to dig deep. Real deep. When we begin to understand the biases against each identity, and how they manifest in the workplace, and how they are compounded against those at the intersections, then we can make informed DEI choices. We can understand our own limitations when it comes to identities that we do not share. We can make the best choices for everyone.
“If we center the experience of women of color,” Tulshyan writes, “we are likely to create cultures that benefit women and men, people of color and white people. And that intersectionality of race and gender must remain at the fore” (9).
Inclusion on Purpose is a must read for anyone looking to dive deeper into becoming a more inclusive community member. With actionable takeaways, research, and simple frameworks, make this your next read. You’ll be all the better for it.
3. This is How We Rise: Reach Your Highest Potential, Empower Women, Lead Change in the World by Claudia Chan
Step 3: Be the community you want to see.
When we look for communities of like-minded individuals, we are often focused on what we will gain from joining them. While there is nothing wrong with this, seeing a community as an interdependent network of growing individuals means we must also acknowledge our own role in creating a healthy community.
In Claudia Chan’s incredibly insightful book, This is How We Rise, the author details through her own difficult career journey how putting the “me” over the “we” just led to resentment and dissatisfaction at the top.
“There is a difference between self-love and being self-centric,” Chan writes. “Self-love is keeping your bucket replenished. Self-centric people put themselves front and center on their own stage” (5).
While this balance can seem nebulous, it really comes down to your why. Are you leading and bringing others along with you? Or are you leading to be in charge?
Again, while there is nothing at all wrong with having aspirations or goals, what is missing for many is a true understanding of community. If you make it to the top, and you look around and there is no one there next to you, it can feel incredibly lonely. Chan details exactly how you can lead with a “we” mentality, and how you can ignite your passion and purpose in community.
Are you a leader looking to connect with other leaders, lead to inspire, and develop some genuine community-building habits? Check out This is How We Rise. You will not be disappointed.
Still Looking for a Genuine Community? CCWomen Membership is Here.
Last week, we launched our CCWomen Membership program at our Las Vegas event! We already have a growing community of amazing professionals who want to help one another reach their goals. With exclusive content and event offerings, book clubs, resources, networking opportunities, and so much more, the CCWomen Membership is ready for you.
You can sign up here. Need to make the business case first? Check out our Ask Your Boss Toolkit for more information on how to ask for sponsorship to the program.
How do you define community? Let us know at ccwomen@cmpteam.com.
